Things I'll Never Say
by Vadrozsa
Summary: Songfic. Kyou/Tohru ^_^


Things I'll Never Say

Tohru woke at daybreak, ready to start another day with the Sohma household. Merrily, she hummed a tune, changing into her uniform before going down to prepare breakfast. But as she went down the landing, she noticed the lights in the kitchen were on. "Iie, what are the lights doing on? Have I been careless again?" she hurried down, in such as rush that she fell down –something that was typical in the life of Honda Tohru. 

"Bang!"

"Tohru!?"

Flustered, a flame-haired boy stuck his head out of the kitchen. "What happened!?"

Dizzily, Tohru tried to stand up. "Ah, ah, anou… Ohayo Kyou-kun."

I'm tugging at my hair  
I'm pulling at my clothes  
I'm trying to keep my cool  
I know it shows

Kyou came out of the kitchen. "Tohru, are you ok? Why are you always falling down!!!???" "A…ano… did I bother Kyou-kun?" "Of course not! I was just making breakfast! It doesn't take up all my brain cells you know!" Kyou snapped back, relieved that she wasn't hurt, and annoyed that he was relieved. "Breakfast?" Tohru smiled up at him. "Arigato Kyou-kun!" Kyou reddened, but tried to hide it. "It's nothing. Afteralll, you do a lot more for us. Since you seemed a little tired waiting up for them last night, I thought I'll make the both of us breakfast." "They haven't come back?" 

"No."

Tohru knew how Kyou felt, being left out of Juunishi meetings at the main house, so she didn't press the issue. "I guess that means it's just you and me this morning Kyou-kun!" she quipped with one of her sunny smiles. She tilted her head, scrutinizing him, before grinning, "Kyou-kun looks so cute in an apron!"

  
I'm staring at my feet  
My cheeks are turning red  
I'm searching for the words inside my head

"…Cute?" the boy scowled, and lightly bonked her on the head, "Try saying that the next time. What the hell! There won't be a next time!" but Tohru went on grinning cheerfully at him, until he too, was forced to smile. It came out awkward and shy, almost clumsy. I hate it. Why can't I smile normally? he wondered, Why can't I show the happiness I feel when I'm with you, Tohru?

  
  
(Cause) I'm feeling nervous  
Trying to be so perfect  
Cause I know you're worth it  
You're worth it  
Yeah

  
  


"Shall we have breakfast now Kyou-kun?" still smiling, Tohru walked into the kitchen. As Kyou quickly finished preparing, she set up the table. In five minutes, they were both seated at the table. "This is really good Kyou-kun!" Tohru exclaimed as she sampled the scrambled eggs. "Wh-what? No way! Tohru, the food you cook is so much better than this." She didn't reply, just grinning contentedly and eating. Kyou shook his head, "Why are you so enthusiastic even over such small things?" Why are you happy with what I do? 

  
If I could say what I want to say  
I'd say I wanna blow you... away  
Be with you every night  
Am I squeezing you too tight

After they'd finished with breakfast, they cleared everything. With two hands, it was soon completed. Kyou looked at the clock: 5.30am It was still to early to start off for school, but still… "Do you want to leave now?" he asked, as the last dished was wiped and placed away. Tohru looked at the clock, "ano… I think we should wait for Shigure-san and Yuki-kun to come back…" she trailed off, looking worried, "But only if that alright with Kyou-kun that is!" Vein-popping Kyou tried to calm himself down… Breathe in. Out. In "I don't mind. I'll go off with you then." He quickly ran out, afraid that he would loose his cool over Yuki's name in front of Tohru. He climbed up to his sanctuary: the roof.

Why does that damn rat bother me even when he's not here!?  
  


If I could say what I want to see  
I want to see you go down  
on top of me   
Marry me today  
Guess, I'm wishing my life away  
With these things I'll never say

  
  
The moon and the stars were still up, although faint glimmers of sunlight could be seen in the east. He stared up, drinking in gasps of cool air. The tranquility of the early morning leveled his thinking somewhat, and cleared his head. "Why did I run?" he asked aloud… "Why didn't I just tell her I never wanted to her that baka's name ever?" but the voice inside him answered _Kyou no baka. You're in love with her._ "I can't help it." _Who ever could?_ "but I must." _Why? Why should you deny this?_ He thought about his life, and his practically non-existent future. "It'll never work."

It don't do me any good  
It's just a waste of time  
What use is it to you  
What's on my mind  
If it ain't coming out  
We're not going anywhere  
So why can't I just tell you that I care  
  
_You'll never know unless you ask._ "So be it. I'd rather it be that way." "Be what way? Kyou-kun?" Tohru was at the top of the ladder, scrambling up the roof. "T-t-Tohru!" Kyou's hair stood on it's ends. "What are you doing up here?" "I-I- wanted to see the rising sun with Kyou-kun I guess. Ano, I am sorry for disturbing you…" The rising sun? Sunrise? _you should stop her before she gets to the ground._ What? Huh? No way!_ DO IT! Prove that you aren't in love with her!_ Arg! "Tohru!" she stopped at her name. "-?"  
"I-It-It's alright. You can join me I guess." As she happily climbed up again, he mumbled, "this is the best view afterall." She smiled gleefully, "It is! Especially with Kyou-kun to watch it the sunrise with me!" "Ah-I—I…" he didn't know what to say. "It's nothing." She looked at him worried, "Are you ok Kyou-kun? You sounded unhappy just now." Unhappy? "Y-you heard me talking!?" "! I didn't mean to! I'm so sorry! I overheard by mistake! How rude of me!" she panicked. "It was nothing. Don't worry yourself over it."

  
What's wrong with my tongue  
These words keep slipping away  
I stutter, I stumble   
Like I've got nothing to say

So many words ran through his head as he sat there. How are you Tohru? How's your job? Not short of money because you got gifts for everyone again right? Is there anything I can do for you? "T-tohru, would you-" she looked at him, "?" He couldn't understand it. Nothing could come out right. "I-It's nothing. F-Forget it." he was glad she was sitting beside him, and thus couldn't see him reddening. I'm such a fool.

"Look Kyou-kun!" Tohru excitedly pointed, "It's that the most beautiful sunrise I've ever seen!"

Kyou didn't say anything, too mesmerized with the image of her bathed in the sun's rays. It cast its brilliant hues over her, her honey-brown hair like a warm, fiery halo about her face. 

He was fighting a losing battle…  
  
Guess I'm wishing my life away with these things I'll never say  
If I could say what I want to say  
I'd say I wanna blow you...away  
Be with you every night  
Am I squeezing you too tight  
If I could say what I want to see  
I want to see you go down  
on top of me

Marry me today  
Yes, I'm wishing my life away  
With these things I'll never say  
These things I'll never say

Because at that moment, a car drove into the walkway.

These things I'll never say

Song by Avril Lavigne.

***~~~~~***

Well? I think it's quite nice in its entirety. But if you want me to continue… ^_^ Review! 


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